IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;
Introduction
WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:
Manifesto Demands
THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”
THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;
THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;
THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;
THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;
THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”
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20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game
0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner
.359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)
29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers
6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.
0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility
10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006
32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007
458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS
2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal
3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league
747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona
118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.
97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.
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Bienemy, you owe me for the keyboard that I just ruined, since I just sprayed Big Red all over it after reading this line "Also, I cannot understand what the big fuss is about the NFC East this year. The Bengals are ALMOST undefeated against them so far. "
Posted by: in McPhie we trust | October 06, 2008 at 11:39 AM
Listen guys, let's pull ourselves back from the edge here and analyze the situation.
Given how banged up our division is, it's very likely that 9 - 11 wins gets us into the playoffs. This season is not over, its just beginning.
I agree with most of your assessments of the game. However, that INT was not Carson's fault. Reggie Kelly sucks as a pass catcher and has always sucked as a pass catcher. Good in other aspects of the game, but this is not his forte. The fricking ball hit part of his body, so he should catch it... I think that's the general rule.
The cedric benson pick up could get us an undervalued asset for cheap.
Thank you for noticing that our Michigan players suck. Leon Hall has impressed me given how much he sucked in college, but he def isn't shut down. Chris Perry looks like he lost a step, and that fumble was the single biggest crux / turning point in the game. I like umich football, but they are hurting us right now.
Posted by: KY6 | October 06, 2008 at 03:10 PM
You forgot another important statistic. Chris Perry leads the league in ALMOST yards after contact.
Posted by: Who Che | October 06, 2008 at 07:03 PM
Domato Peko leads the league in ALMOST making a tackle if you count the number of times his flowing mane touches running backs as they race past him.
Posted by: Brosef Stalin | October 07, 2008 at 10:38 AM
are you people for real??
Posted by: Dale | October 07, 2008 at 04:39 PM
Dale - obviously we are using sarcasm. Or perhaps you think the Bengals are good?
Posted by: Sleeping With Bieniemy | October 07, 2008 at 06:16 PM
I heard today on the radio that the Bengals are scheduling a fly-over by the USAF before the Steelers game. Hmmm? I wonder if this is a ploy to dismiss the STEP DOWN MIKE BROWN banner that was to be flown before the game. I`m thinking Mikey-boy did this to keep the air-space restricted by the USAF for the fly-over so people and media can not see the banner, at least not near PBS. Just a thought, but fishy don`t you think?
Posted by: Mike Brown to counter plane banner with pre-game fly-over | October 18, 2008 at 08:29 PM